Elopement vs. Wedding

Elopement vs. wedding –
how to choose?

What is an Elopement?

The traditional meaning of an elopement is two people running away, often in secret, to get married. That’s pretty dated. And it tends to have a negative connotation.

I think of an elopement as a wedding that occurs outside of a formal venue and has a very small guest list. Perhaps it’s immediate family only. Maybe it’s just the three of us (and your dog?!).

Elopements usually (but don’t always) skip some of the more formal parts of weddings like dancing and or even a formal meal.

Couples like to elope because:

There is more time to focus solely on each other.
They can adventure to more or different places.
They spend less money on a venue or other “stuff”

I like elopements because:

We have more flexibility in choosing locations.
We can brave weather conditions guests might grumble about.
There is more time for creative, relaxed portraits.

Some of my favorite elopement photos.

Maybe it was the route we took to get there, the weather we endured, or the amount of time we spent.
These photos were unlikely to happen during a traditional wedding day.

Sara’s product is very, very human… and also beautiful. –Matt and Ma’ikwe

What are the benefits of a small wedding?

Whether you consider this an asset or not is entirely dependent on you. Weddings with more guests shift some of the private time you would have during an elopement and allow you time to spend with your family and closest friends. The sweet spot for me are weddings with under 100 guests. That’s where I feel like I can give you proper, human interaction and deliver the photos you want.

Couples like weddings with guests because:

They’re thrilled to have all their favorite people together for the first (and maybe last) time.
There are important cultural or spiritual aspects they want to include.
They love a good party.

I like weddings with guests because:

I am a sentimental sap.
It’s sometimes easier to get candid photos when people can forget I’m there.
Parent dances, kids eyeballing the cake, and embarrassing toasts that make people belly-laugh.

Some of my favorite wedding guest photos

Enthusiastic flower girls, parent dances, quiet moments before the ceremony.
These are some of the candid moments that are only possible when you include guests in your wedding day.

Our pictures capture all the wide range of emotions and silliness of the day. –Blair and Kenneth

Great, now I want both of those things.

I know. I had a picture in my head of my husband and I having a relaxing day together and watching the sun rise over the mountains. But I also couldn’t imagine getting married without my grandmother there. Just like the rest of life, the rules of weddings are rarely black and white.

There are always ways to creatively get exactly what you’re imagining. Without having to choose between an elopement vs. wedding.

Mariah and Lance

had a sunrise ceremony at the top of Hoosier Pass and then a larger reception two days later. Bonus: that gave me time to prepare a slideshow for their guests.

Elopement vs. wedding, small mountaintop ceremony.

Anna and John

intentionally built out plenty of time for us to do a first look and mountaintop photos on Cottonwood Pass before the traditional celebrations with their families at the Orpheum in Buena Vista.

Wedding vs. elopement, Cottonwood Pass portrait

Choosing between an elopement and a wedding with guests, dancing

Jaime and Jeremiah

had a mid-day ceremony at the Black Canyon Inn. They then told their guests to enjoy Estes Park for the afternoon while we explored Rocky Mountain National Park together.

Estes Park small wedding with elopement compromise.

Rocky Mountain National Park elopement, small ceremony

Todd and Evan

rented a private cabin for a cozy winter elopement, then had a backyard wedding with family in the summer.

Bekah and Jacob

had a ceremony within Rocky Mountain National Park. But first, they arrived hours before their guests to do a private first look and go as high up the mountain as the roads would allow us.

wedding vs. elopement compromise with family

Winter elopement vs. small wedding ceremony

Sara does an excellent job finding candid moments when people don’t even know she’s there. –Mariah and Lance

Is an elopement or small wedding right for me?

Only you can answer that. As I said above, I think there are countless, creative ways to have a bit of both on your wedding day. My advice is to make a list of pros and cons for each. If one seriously outweighs the other, you have a fairly easy answer! If they are exactly split, the only way you will truly get both is to commit to two distinct days. That’s double the celebration!

For everyone else who has some in both columns, imagine it this way: if you HAD to choose right now between the two options, which would it be? If you’re leaning a bit towards a small wedding with guests, you should make sure to intentionally carve out some time for just the two of you on the day. And not just 30 minutes after the ceremony while everyone grabs a snack- real time together. If you have a slight preference for a private elopement, plan that first. Then look for ways you can celebrate with family earlier or later in the day.

How many hours of photography are needed for an elopement vs. wedding?

Probably more than you think. In general, take whatever number you’re imagining and then add an hour or two. Give yourself time to breathe and relax on your wedding day without trying to adhere to some tightly-orchestrated schedule.

Here are a few examples of real weddings to give you an idea of how the day might flow.

10 Hours – 2 Days

Day 1
5 am: Meet at parking lot
5-6 am: Hike up to ceremony site
6-7:30 am: Vow exchange with mountaintop photos as the sun rises
7:30-9 am: Hike back to parking lot with photos along the way

Day 2
3pm: Meet at reception location. Lawn games, snacks, etc.
4-5pm: Family photos at venue.
5-5:30 pm: Photos of the couple downtown
5:30 pm: Dinner begins
6pm: Toasts, parent dances, slideshow of Day 1 photos
7-9pm: Dancing and general merriment

8 Hours

2-3 pm: Meet for getting ready photos.
Details (flowers, rings, etc.)
Scenery shots before guests start to move things.
3-3:30 pm: Photos of each partner with wedding party/immediate family (separately)
3:30-4:30: Drive to nearby lake (separately). First look and couple’s portraits.
5-5:30: Ceremony
5:30-6: Family portraits
6-6:30: Cocktail hour continues, candid photographs
6:30-7: Guests are seated for dinner
7-7:30: Toasts, parent dances, first dance
7:30-8: Couples photos at sunset
8-10: Dancing and general merriment

5 Hour wedding

3-3:45: Very end of getting ready (getting dressed) plus a few detail shots
4-4:30: Ceremony
4:30-5: Family and wedding party photos
5-5:30: Couples photos
5:30-6: Guests begin to eat dinner
6-6:30: Toasts, parent dances, first dance
6:30-7:30: Dancing and general merriment
7:30-8: Couples photos at sunset before photographer leaves

5 Hour elopement

3-3:30 pm: Meet couple at their Air B&B. First look, then packing their picnic and gear.
3:30-4pm: Facetime with family while we still have a signal. Virtual toasts and speeches.
4-4:30: Drive to trailhead
4:30-5: Short hike to awesome mountain views
5-5:30: Exchange vows, rings, and gifts for each other
5:30-6: Set up picnic and crack the champagne
6-7:15: Explore the area and take photos as the sun sets
7:15-8: Hike back to the car with photos along the way